The postman always… drop kicks it across the mailroom

Was going through my phone camera’s humble collection of pictures and discovered the pictures below.

My good-natured and well-meaning sister intended to surprise me for my birthday and mail me, amongst other things, a six-pack of Windhoek Lager for my birthday – bless her soul.

She undertook this project early in January, well in advance of my March birthday, making plenty of allowance for the notoriously slow delivery system.

Well, I didn’t track this package down until May, the 11th, if I can believe the date on the pictures. Actually, I only went to the post office a month earlier to inquire on my Sis behalf, as she had insured the package, and wanted to claim for it, fearing it had gone.

My cynical self thought that some thirsty post office workers somewhere along the line had discovered the loot and had treated themselves to some beer – it’s known to happen in the South African Post Office. But, my critics prove me wrong when the Kota Kinabalu Post Office phoned me to say they tracked down my package.

With expectations of cold Windhoek Lager with dinner, I set off the post office… the guy was a little scared to give it to me and eventually sent over his Superior to bare the brunt of what they thought would undoubtedly be outrage at the state the package was in. I had already written it off as gone, so I was cool, even when I saw this…

Exhibit One - Why is my package in a sealed plastic bag?
My first thought was ‘oh, I wonder why it’s in a sealed plastic bag’.

The pung nearly knocked me off my feet - found the answer
Once I cut through the industrial strength bag, the pung nearly knocked me off my feet and I nearly vomited right there, barely managing to contain myself. The package was quite obviously crushed, and it was wet and covered in mold.

The Contents
I managed to get what was once a box off the contents with a pen, it was that wet and rancid. The cans had been crushed, exploded and were all empty except for two…

Anything edible?
Ever the optimist I inspected the cans to see whether or not I would contract some horrible disease if I attempted to ingest any of the contents. I gave the biscuits and other things a wide berth and concentrated on the two intact cans…

Should be a crime to treat beer like this
Eventually only one can passed the test (not the one pictured) and only because I felt my tetanus shots were up to date. It was quarantined in a plastic bag and rode home in my car’s boot, but still managed to stink up my ride. After cleaning it and making sure the rust didn’t actually penetrate the can, it was chilled and enjoyed.

Thanks Sis!

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